Review

Official Jersey Shore Parody. Yes. You read that title correctly. So, right now you're either squirming in your seat with glee, or rolling your eyes in disgust. Or perhaps both. Whether you like it or not, MTV's (s)hit reality show is now a porn-tacular spoof for all the world to see. From the delightfully demented minds of the multiple AVN-nominated duo who unleashed POPPORN: The Guide to Making Fuck and the even more insane TMSleaze comes this "how didn't it write itself" parody of one of the most polarizing, obnoxious, yet hypnotically watchable reality shows in recent memory. For the two or three of you who've been living under a rock, Jersey Shore is a bowel-movement shrill-ality show on MTV that follows a crew of Italian American strangers all tossed together in a beach house for the summer in which hilarity, heinous hygiene, bitchslaps, ripped abs, and idiocy reigned supreme.

Controversy erupted almost from the get-go, as our lovely crew of Rhodes Scholars lovingly took to referring to each other as Guidos and Guidettes, stereotypical stupidity ran rampant, and the charming young lass known as Snooki (you know - the one who looks like Hobbit Elvira) got cocked in her pickle-sucking mug by a drunken dirtbag one night at a club. Yes, it was all so sweet and innocent until screenwriters and co-directors Bangs and BUCKTON got their grubby little mitts upon this tall tale. Well, they've done a horrendously brilliant bang-up job bringing this mess-terpiece to cock-throbbing life.

Yes, just like POPPORN and TMSleaze this is a straight porn flick, but just like those two smash hit flixxx this one "speaks" to us gays, as the humor is off-the-wall, the performances are dead-on (to the point of practically being camp), and the guys in the cast are so smoking hot you won't even notice the snatch. (Well, you might need to cover your eyes a few times, but there 'ya go.) There's no fisting to be found here, but there's plenty of fist pumping, most notably from hubba-hubba hunka-hunka James Deen as DJ Pauly-D, and drop-dead hottie Rocco Reed as the one and only Situation. (I wouldn't mind having a situation or two with one or both of them together.) The flick covers every darling bit of the show and then some, plus you'll get to freely masturbate and not feel one iota of guilt at all! (Pity real-life Ronnie turned out to be a bit of a 'phobe, huh?) The videography, the sets, the script, the casting are all top-notch, and we honestly think if you have an open mind and an unzipped zipper you'll have a complete blast with this one.

 -- Keeneye Reeves